Saturday, October 19, 2013

Horror Anthology Drinking Game

(To be played during the reading of DC horror anthologies like "House of Secrets" and "The Witching Hour".)

Take a sip whenever a character is revealed as a vampire in the last two pages of another kind of horror story ("It was then that the alien realized he'd abducted...a vampire!" Or similar.)

Take a sip whenever the protagonist of a ghost/werewolf/vampire/mummy/whatever story realizes that he/she is the ghost/werewolf/vampire/mummy/whatever.

Take a drink when a character finds out he/she is actually a robot. (This may result in a sip and a drink if it happens at the end of a story about robots.)

Take a sip when the host's closing narration completely changes the story ("...but of course, he died in a car accident a week later.")

Take a sip when the main character's significant other turns out to be a witch. Take a second sip if it happens on the last page of a story where witches were not previously mentioned. Take a third if it was a story where the supernatural was not previously a plot element.

Take a drink every time someone recognizes which Edgar Allan Poe story they're ripping off this month.

Finish the bottle every time the narrator shows up as a character in the story.

Take a drink every time the narrator refers to the narrator of another DC horror title in their narration.

Take a drink every time the real monster is...Man! (As opposed to taking a drink every time the real monster is Woman.)

Pour a shot whenever an ugly character is victimized by a pretty one to drive home a point about being shallow. Drink it when an ugly character is the villain anyway.

Drink a shot of the oldest alcohol you have in the house whenever immortality is depicted as a curse.

Take a sip every time you catch yourself wondering why there are Sergio Aragones drawings in a horror anthology.

And lastly, take a drink every time the story is a thinly-veiled ripoff of 'The Monkey's Paw', 'The Most Dangerous Game', or 'The Legend of Sleepy Hollow'. (As with all Fraggmented drinking games, the management cannot be held responsible for any incidents of alcohol poisoning related to the practice herein described.)

Monday, October 14, 2013

Re-Spooning

Sorry about the lack of posts lately. Been feeling all kinds of sick, and just as I felt like I was starting to get it together, my workplace took away Google Chrome, leaving me with a greatly diminished set of posting options. I'm posting this from a Kindle, and we'll see how that goes. On the other hand, there appear to be nine more new Doctor Who episodes out there since I last posted, so that's awesome...even if it does mean Ian Levine will be even more insufferable about his insider fan status.

Speaking of cult TV, I have been watching the Agents of SHIELD series, and liking it. I am not unaware of the complaints about the series, and don't entirely disagree--Ward is a stiff, and I'm not loving the chemistry he has with Skye. But as with so many series out there, I feel like people are complaining not because the show is bad, but because it doesn't seem to be building a huge, overarching metastory that they can invest their emotions into speculating about. But I am actually a fan of episodic these days, primarily after being disappointed by series like Heroes, so I'm not disappointed that it's not being something it wasn't trying to be. (I still feel like this was the cause of a lot of the fan backlash against Dollhouse.)

Oh, and the Amazing Race is happening again. For fans of train wrecks, I guarantee you that you will not find a better train wreck than Tim and Marie. These two are already divorced, meaning that the bickering has already reached nuclear proportions, and they lucked into the double Express Pass in the first round, leading to some of the most hilariously inept attempts at manipulation EVER. At one point, she tells a team who she thinks has a lead on good tickets, "You know I have the Express Pass." My current working theory is that she thinks it works like Wonder Woman's magic lasso, forcing other racers to tell the truth. I'm torn between despising her sense of entitlement and not wanting the shitshow to end.

I know, talking about TV ain't exactly Shakespeare. I'm easing my way back, OK? Next time I might even be up to complaining about comics.